Changing Failure to Success

Failure has several teachers whereas success has only one celebration

How to convert failure into success and learn from both?

We need challenges

Suppose you can jump ten feet and someone tells you to jump two feet and achieve it as a goal, would you accept it? Probably not. We hate to achieve what we are capable of! We need challenges and we want goals that are difficult to achieve. The tougher the goal, the greater the sense of satisfaction. (See Aspiration and Achievement)

We want difficult goals

Suppose you can jump ten feet and someone tells you to jump twelve feet and achieve it as a goal, would you accept it? Probably yes. We love to achieve more than what we are capable of! We can do with a little excitement and we abhor easy goals. The easier the goal, the lesser the sense of satisfaction. (See Can we live without goals?)

Chance of failure

How come when we are given a choice that is easy for us, we reject it and when it is difficult, we readily agree to it? The answer lies in the secret of the ‘Chance of Failure!’ If everyone who attempts it, is going to succeed, then there is no sense of achievement. Only a few should be able to succeed, and we always try to be one of them. (See Planning Success)

We always don’t succeed

Given the chance that only a few can succeed, what happens when we fail? Some of us resign to the fact and accept defeat. Some of us take it emotionally and blame others. Most of us make another attempt to succeed. (See Who is in charge of our lives?)

Mantra on why a change is necessary?

If we keep doing what we are doing, we will keep getting what we are getting

If we don’t want to get what we are getting, we have to change what we are doing

If we don’t change what we are doing, we will continue to get what we are getting

Because what we are getting is dependent on what we are doing

A Three-pronged approach

A three-pronged approach can be used to know how to achieve a goal or how to change failure toward success. A Triangular approach is better as it covers all the angles. Even if one angular approach fails, the other two will help us in targeting the goal.

The Three-pronged Solution

A three-pronged solution can be adapted to convert failure into success. Understanding is the essence and such an understanding will help in determining where failure has occurred and what measures to take to reduce or eliminate the errors.

Understanding is the essence

Understand the goal – Analyse the goal, quantify the goal, and evaluate the goal

Understand yourself – Understand your knowledge, attitude, and skills

Understand goal-directed behavior – Understand the direction of the goal, the route to the goal, and the mode of the goal.

Let us try to know about each one in a little more detail.

A. Understand the goal

Do you need it? Why do you need it? Can you do without it?

What changes occur when you reach the goal?

What is the time frame to make all the changes necessary?

1. Analyze the goal

How far is the goal? How big or small is the goal?

What should you prepare to reach the goal? How to reach there?

What will you get out of the goal? Do you get satisfaction after reaching the goal?

2. Quantify the goal

Is there a number associated with the goal? Is the number realistic?

Is there a time frame to reach the goal?

Has the time frame been divided into specific stages?

3. Evaluate the goal

What are the advantages or disadvantages you would encounter after reaching the goal?

What advantages will give you pleasure or what disadvantages will give you problems?

Are you ready to forego those advantages that are not there?

B. Understand yourself

Are you able to enhance your knowledge, attitude, and skill to match what is essential to reach the goal?

Have you found out how many of these you already have?

Have you measured the lacunae in these to complete the requirements?

1. Your Knowledge

Do you know the risks you would have to take to reach the goal? What is your past performance?

Have you reached goals previously? If so, what strategies did you adopt? Can you use the same strategies now?

If you failed earlier, do you know the reasons? Is it because the goal was too tough?

2. Your Attitude

What is the cost at which you would like to reach the goal?

Is your goal chosen by you independently or is it chosen for you by someone else?

How much do others’ approval of your goals is important to you?

3. Your Skills

Are you dependent on someone for reaching the goal? Can you go so far?

How much is the dependency? How much is the inter-dependency?

Suppose the person you depend upon is not able to help you out. Can you do it on your own?

C. Understand Goal-directed behavior

Can you adopt a systematic approach?

Do you approach the goal step by step or in one go?

Can you perform the way it is expected to give desirable results?

1. The direction of the goal

Is the direction you have chosen the shortest route to the goal, or a shortcut?

Is the goal full-time or part-time?

Have you considered other directions before you ruled them out?

2. The route to the goal

Is the route you have chosen better than the other routes?

Have you avoided the shortcuts to the goal and analyzed other routes?

Are you a little flexible about time and resources?

3. Mode to the goal

Has the method been strictly understood and followed?

Is the mode automatic? Are any of the existing systems being used?

Have the other existing systems been objectively evaluated?

The Success Mantra - 1

Your goal should be as much as you can digest

Too big a goal often leads to failure. Aspire for the minimum that gives you satisfaction. If the minimum can’t satisfy you, the abundance of it will never be able to satisfy you.

The Success Mantra - 2

The feeling of failure is in everybody, even in the person who succeeds.

People who succeed are more disappointed with their success than people who fail. The moment I get what I aspired for, I will start wishing that I should have aspired for more. Learn to be happy with what comes to you.
The Success Mantra - 3

When everything you do is okay and you still fail, be happy that you have attempted.

You are better than most who made no attempts. There is always a next time when you can attempt one more time. If there is a series of continuous successes, it gets boring! Failure is part of life and it is the failure that makes success enjoyable.